Monday 22 January 2018

A Perfect Life!

As I leave for my vacation tonight- sitting at the airport, looking at people, I realise everyone's at a different point in their life. There's someone crying for they have to move away from their loved ones, there's someone excited to go on their honeymoon and then there's someone who's exhausted from travelling for work.

Over the past few days- some friends, some colleagues, some relatives- everyone has told me how jealous they are that I get to take a break and go for my vacay. And over the past few months, I've also been approached by people who read my blog, and keep up with my life- and I have been told how jealous they are as my life is perfect! Tonight, I've decided to set the record straight!

Ladies, those of you who mention being envious of of how many men approach me or how my life is full of mysterious and amazing guys- you should know that the only guy I want in my life doesn't want me back.

Those of you who think I'm always going from one city to another or travelling around- you should know that being away from home kills me, and I have absolutely no one to keep me company in the city that I'm presently in.

People who say they feel jealous of the number of friends I have, should know that some very important friends have backstabbed me over the years and I have lost touch with most of the people I knew growing up.

The point is, everything comes at a cost! And ups and downs are a part of life. My life is far from perfect- it's a mess to be honest- I'm in a city that I don't like or have friends in; I'm in a relationship that exists only in my head and the man in question couldn't care less; my parents have given me an ultimatum on zeroing upon a guy to tie the knot with, while I still struggle to understand my own feelings; I mostly spend weekends watching re-runs of "Friends"! And to top it all, my new job is a big change from my previous line of work, and poses a big challenge!

I'm not saying there are no positives about my life- of course I write about those, so there are. The truth is, there's enough negativity and sadness in all of our lives in general that subjecting my readers to the sadness in mine, doesn't seem fair.

Having said that, I would just want you to know that we are all like these people at the airport- we're all going somewhere, and we've all come from somewhere! We all are just in different phases of life- some of us are sad, some of us are happy, some are excited and some are just plain exhausted. But the point is, time's going to change, circumstances will change, and we will change and who knows maybe the next time you're at the airport- you'll be the happiest person there! I'm hoping I'll be the happiest once I'm back from my vacation.

Till then, don't draw comparisons- learn lessons from my life, but don't be jealous- I have more problems than you can possibly imagine- but I'm getting by, just like I'd like you to! Know that "Perfection" is a myth- the truth is life is unfair to all, and that's why it's fair!

Friday 12 January 2018

Life Lesson 2017!




I've already talked about the men 2017 brought along - the good ones, the bad ones, and the absolutely disgusting ones too- all of them. But what's more important, is the life lessons 2017 decided to bless me with. In the past so many years of my existence, never has an year taught me so much. And as per my policy about life lessons, I've decided to share them all with you.

You already know about the numerous ones Mr. E taught me in the past year. So let's talk about what life taught me this year!

Dressing up in red for my New year's Eve celebrations, as suggested by mom (she says- wear red as you ring in the new year so that you'll get married this year)- my mind drifted to the past few months and I started to think of how none of my plans have fallen into place- including the one to wear that black dress tonight.

All of 2017, I planned extensively, not just about my career but also about my personal life. I had plans to move to another team at my organisation. I had plans to meet Mr. Right.  I had plans to go on a trip to Thailand around Christmas and that's where i was supposed to be ringing in the new year- of course on a beach and in a black dress- but who had other plans? Destiny.



This, as I like to put it, is the biggest lesson I've learnt in 2017- that no amount of prediction and planning and elaborate detailed layouts of how things are supposed to be, in my head would do me any good. Fighting with the universe and trying to change the course of my destiny or wanting something or someone that clearly doesn't belong to me will only lead to wastage of my efforts and an unappreciative attitude on the part of the other person and the universe in general.

To be honest, in the past year, I've had the best and the worst time of my life. It has been such an amazing contradiction of sorts. For instance, I lost a great deal of weight- but at the same time, had to give up on my first love- french fries. I found a better job, but had to move to another, less likeable city to pursue the same. And of course, I met someone I genuinely liked after years- but that doesn't seem to be going anywhere. But it's all destiny's plan, I'm certain.

I can list 3467589 instances if I have to where things have happened as per destiny's choice and not mine- the move to Bangalore, falling for someone I didn't intend to fall for, the sudden trip to Delhi in November and so on. In fact, when Thailand didn't work out for the holidays, I decided to spend some time back at home, in Delhi and I planned my dates keeping in mind that I'd want to steal some time to spend with Mr. E but well, as destiny would have it, that didn't quite happen.

All in all, 2017 has been the year that I realised that no plan has been or will be more elaborate or more workable than the one destiny has for me. No matter what I think, say, or invest my efforts in- in the end, Destiny and the universe are going to work things out on their own. And all this will happen at it's own pace.



Having said that, I don't think this means that I stop putting in efforts in the things and people I want to pursue. Because, as the saying goes, god helps those who help themselves. But it just strengthens my belief in Destiny and it's plan and I'm more at peace knowing that I'm not the planner- just the part of the plan. And of course, I believe in Karma- but can Karma change my destiny? Slightly, as I like to believe. Good Karma can maybe, to an extent negate the effects of Bad Karma and positively alter my destiny a bit maybe? I'd like to hope so.

So as I step into 2018, I'm leaving behind anxiety, and I'm leaving behind planning- I'm adopting a more 'go with the flow' attitude- while still pursuing with extreme passion the things and the people that I truly want in my life- because "Even the Universe is known to fall in love with a stubborn heart!"

Wishing you all a very Happy 2018! How are you stepping into 2018 like?